New Year, New Possibilities

2012, hello.

I’m ready for a new year. New horizons. New goals. Fresh starts.

I have a small working list of specific goals for this year. I’d like to make homemade marshmallows and orange rolls. Lose the last 15 pounds. Take voice lessons. Sew dresses for my girls. (Pay someone to) reupholster the chairs. Stop traveling through life with so much excess, by way of possessions. Discover an affordable whole foods convenient food other than PBJ.

But I’m not too concerned with those. They’ll work themselves out.

This year I am looking forward to a year of Beauty.

Not beauty, the pretty, the perfect, the pristine.

But beauty the large, the untamed, the imperfect. Courageous. Visceral.

I spent my twenties getting my ducks in a row. Learning how to organize my household, my family, myself. I’ve got an awesome collection of tools now at my disposal, to be used as needed. It was a great journey, full of hard work, research, and failures. But now, for the most part, I’v got it, know how to do it, know how to change it when needed.

This year I’m wide open, finally ready for the new journey promised by my 30s. I’m ready to soak up and delve in. I’m ready to learn.

I anticipate it looking something like this…

:: I know how to organize my home. I’m not sure how to make it a place of beauty that reflects my taste and style.

:: I know how to streamline and organize my wardrobe. I need to acquire courage to spend money on clothes, and to learn how to shop productively so that I can wear clothes I think are beautiful.

:: I know how to sing. I need the courage to finally accept that I don’t have a pretty little obedient voice. I have a wild and unruly instrument that truly only works when I let go of the desire to control it.

:: I know how to care for my children and my husband. I want to learn how to become more intuitive, more present, more relational.

:: I know how to be authentic with myself. I want to learn how to be more authentic with other people in ways that benefit all parties.

:: I know pure joy and I know pure frustration. I’m looking for an emotional spectrum that has shades and layers and nuances.

Do you begin to see what kind of beauty I’m after? Maybe something that looks a little like this.

20120104-151956.jpg

{photo via Dance.net.au of Paco Pena Flamenco Dance Company}

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4 thoughts on “New Year, New Possibilities

  1. Yes. I get it. Actually it’s hard to respond in words. I’d like to applaud in response. I’m not quite through the trial-some and failure-wrought twenties, but MAN you make thirty sound good. Here’s to raw beauty.

  2. Starting my family in my 30s, maybe that’s what my 40s will look like? 🙂

    All I have to say is “You GO girl!” And you have an amazing way with words.

  3. Pingback: notice | spinning in my teacup

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