Two years later, I’m ready to return. I’m returning to this diary of daily life. To the act of pausing to record, to spin, to toil over words and meaning.
Two years have taken me out to the other side of my first mid-life crisis, through health problems, through the grieving of the end of the Baby Years. I can now look at pictures of my babies without sobbing uncontrollably–it has dialed down to a small ache and a tear or two. I can read through my old posts without feeling like my heart is being ripped to shreds. See, I’ve come so far!
Two years away has helped me to let go of any self-inflicted pressure or hope to make my blog like all those nice ones I read. There is no niche here. There will not be many photos. There will not be regular posting. There will not be a treasure trove of carefully crafted posts that always end nicely. And I’m okay with that. Great with that! <insert Julie Andrews singing Cinderella’s “In My Own Little Corner”>
Right now, I am in my cool, dark room, with the door closed. There is a wild (and noisy) foosball game going on in the living room, contestants clad only in underwear. I had planned to work on sewing my slinky opera dress, but the sheer volume of noise drove me to my room where the hollow core door filters out a teeny bit of the sound.
We spent some time today during school looking at physical maps of the Pacific Northwest. We are hoping to make a road trip up there this summer as part of Devo’s sabbatical. Sierra Nevadas! Shasta! Cascades! Mt. St. Helens! (No, it will not erupt while we are there, Levi. I promise.) Olympic rainforest! Banff! Lia would like to extend the trip and come back down through as many states as possible, “But not that state that’s just all corn, what state is that again, Mommy?”. It turns out that both Lia and Amelie really want to go to Four Corners. Amelie spread eagled on the floor, practicing for touching all four states. Kiri set up housekeeping for her calico critters under the red umbrella.
Amelie and Levi have been learning to do round-offs. We are a month and a half in to gymnastics and it has been a wild success with the three oldest children. Apparently, there is an entire section of youtube taken over by small teeny-bopper gymnasts showing off their skills in their backyards and basements and encouraging you to like their posts and doing shout outs to commenters. I find it fascinating and puzzling. But we thank them for giving us lots of instruction on how to do the things the kids want to learn to do. A few youtube tutorials and an hour on the trampoline and they can both do something that is recognizable as an attempted round-off. Self-driven research and practice warms my Mommy heart.